Suck It Up And Die!

Like most teens, Morning McCobb has hopes and ambitions that are counterbalanced by his insecurities and an inability to adequately communicate his feelings. He also has this whole vampire thing going on. Being a vampire probably wouldn’t be so bad, but Morning has the added responsibility of being the reluctant poster boy for the Vampire Pride movement. See, Morning was outed as a vampire, which has led to major changes in the world. There are new prejudices, organizations seeking to secure civil liberties for vampires (the International Vampire League), organizations which oppose the vampire movement at every turn (the Mortals Only Party), and…of course….vampire reality television. Morning would rather have nothing to do with any of it; he’s focused on achieving his dream of becoming a firefighter and spending as much time with his constantly-on-the-go filmmaker girlfriend as inhumanly possible. He has neither the time, nor the desire, for further complications.

Tough luck. Trouble is coming his way in the form of an angry Congresswoman and the return of an old nemesis who has learned that working the system can be more effective method of stalking one’s prey than the tired ways of Bela Lugosi and his ilk.

I was reluctant to read this one for a couple of reasons. First off, it’s a sequel. Having not read the first book, I was afraid I’d be lost or missing out on things previously established. Secondly, I’ve not taken much interest in the wave of vampires that ‘s flooded the shores of popular culture. I read a chapter of one of the Twilight books, shook my head at the prose, and quickly set it down. I’ve watched a couple of episodes of True Blood and felt that it was just all over the place, haphazardly seeking to cram every myth and legend available into a single storyline. The first problem was easily remedied as author Brian Meehl does a fantastic job of filling readers in on what has gone before, while simultaneously moving the current plot forward. The second problem was alleviated by the tone of the book. While the story covers several serious and topical subjects, it remains lighthearted and cleverly utilizes wordplay to bring charm to even the darkest of moments. It’s this, the subversiveness of these seemingly flippant one-liners and word manipulations that make this a book worth your time, especially if you’ve an aspirations to become a writer yourself. Meehl is writing about vampires here, yes, but he’s also writing about much, much more. You can learn a lot about structure and form in a classroom, but you have to actually see the tricks sentences are capable of in order to truly spark your ambition and imagination. Meehl knows several tricks, and Suck It Up and Die is his three-ring circus.

Suck It Up and Die is written by Brian Meehl, published by Delacorte Press, and can be purchased here: http://www.randomhouse.com/kids/catalog/results.pperl?keyword=Suck+It+Up+And+Die&submit.x=0&submit.y=0&submit=submit

Reviewed by T-Shirt Joe

Marvel Comics The Untold Story

If you’re one of those comic readers who feels that the talent behind the book is more important than the villain Spider-Man is fighting each month, then this book should be of particular interest to you. It’s the story of the business side of Marvel Comics, and it’s not a pleasant one. A story where the ‘bad guys’ play for keeps, and where the ‘good guys’ rarely win.

Author Sean Howe devotes a large portion of this book to exposing a side of Stan Lee that many ‘True Believers’ may not be familiar with, the Stan Lee who was more at home talking about comics in university lecture halls than actually writing them, the Stan Lee who wanted to distance himself from comics unless it was a means of getting his foot in the door with Hollywood, the Stan Lee who hasn’t read a Marvel comic in decades, Stan Lee the flim-flam man.

  This may all be true, but what the book doesn’t tell you is that Marvel Comics may not have become such a break-out success without Lee’s carnival barker antics. Marvel needed personality, it needed someone to cry out to the world that these comics were the greatest thing around and you were really missing out if you weren’t reading them. While all the rest of Lee’s contributions to Marvel may be in question, his skill at selling the product to the consumer is not.

The book chronicles the legal battles of creators such as Steve Gerber (Howard the Duck), Marv Wolfman (Blade), Steve Ditko (Spider-Man), and, of course, Jack Kirby (the core Marvel characters) against Marvel. We’re shown Marvel’s method of cleaning house whenever a new regime of management took control of the company. Howe gives us the play-by-play as Marvel grooms a roster of superstar artists, only to have them give the company the collective finger and leave to start their own publishing house. We see how creators struck back at editors by hiding criticisms within the narratives of their books. We learn why particular storylines, such the infamous “Clone Saga” which ran through the Spider-Man titles, had such peculiar and unsatisfying conclusions. Readers are introduced to a revolving door of editors-in-chief and are given a glimpse of what they managed to accomplish and destroy during their time at the wheel. Howe gives us all that, and so much more.
This book may just make you hate Marvel Comics, but it’s a book that everyone who loves comics should read.

Marvel Comics: The Untold Story is written by Sean Howe, published by Harper Collins, and can be purchased here: http://www.harpercollins.com/books/Marvel-Comics-Sean-Howe?isbn=9780061992100&HCHP=TB_Marvel+Comics

Reviewed by T-Shirt Joe

Roots of the Swamp Thing!

Swamp Thing has achieved nowhere near the popularity of his comic book bretheren. He’s been pushed to the shadows. That’s too bad, because he may be the most compelling character that the comic field has to offer. Like Ben Grimm, he’s a man trapped in the body of a monster. Unlike Mr. Grimm, this ‘monster’ doesn’t have the support of a surragate family. This tradepaperback presents readers with the very first appearance of Swamp Thing as a stand-alone story in House of Mystery, then takes us through his adventures in his own self-titled series. Through the course of the series we see Swamp Thing face off against a werewolf, a Frankenstien inspired ‘Patchwork Man’, a witch, a Lovecraftian nightmare, and the Batman.

These stories stand the test of time due in strong part to the art of Berni Wrightson, whose work improves from issue to issue. One of the big problems, however, is the character if Matthew Cable. He meets the Hollands once, fails to protect them from being assassinated, then spend the rest of the series proclaiming that they were his best friends. Throughout the series he also claims to be an agent of the CIA, the FBI, and whatever other government organization you could think of. Whichever one it is, he must have quite a bit of clout as his pusuit of the Swamp Thing takes him from the Louisianna bayous to he Swiss Alps.

This trade is great because we get to see berni Wrightson’s progression as an artist. He truly does get better from issue to issue. Also prenented in this trade are three never-before-reprinted stories drawn by Nestor Redondo. These stories are quite different from the others presented in this trade as writer Len Wein seems to have been going for more of a continuing narrative, but they are no less effective. Redondo is given a number of grotesque creatues to draw and does not disappoint.
Fans of DC’s new incarnation of Swamp Thing should pick this one up to see where it all began.

Roots of the Swamp Thing is published by DC Comis, written by Len Wein, with art by Berni Wrightston and Nestor Redondo.

Reviewed by T-Shirt Joe

For more of my reviews go to AlienBee.net

The Bloody Crown of Conan

Robert E. Howard is a writer who’s work I frequently come back to. His short stories and novellas hold as much excitement for me now as they did when I first read them at the age of twelve. I travel a lot, and listen to many an audio-book while on the road, so I was more than happy to see an audio collection of Conan stories available for purchase.

The stories are read by Todd McLaren, and it must have been a daunting task for him. Every fan of the Conan stories has a distinct idea of what he should sound like. We were all somewhat forgiving of Arnold making Conan sound like a bit like a special-education student, because we were finally seeing him come to the screen, but this is the real deal, the stuff written by his creator. Sure enough, the first time McLaren read a line of Conan’s dialogue I thought, “That’s not Conan’s voice.” It’s a minor complaint, and one only I and other fellow Conan fanatics would make. After a while, however, I became so caught up in Howard’s prose, his tremendous descriptions of combat, and the intrigues of the Hyborian Age, that it eventually became Conan’s voice I was hearing. McLaren did his job, and did it well.

The collection contains three of the longer Conan works:
The People of the Black Circle: A personal favorite in which Conan becomes caught in the machinations of a wizard in love, a vengeful queen, and some very angry hillmen.
The Hour of the Dragon: A full length novel in which Conan, King of Aquilonia, loses his throne through the seemingly limitless power of the wizard Xaltotun. His only hope of defeating the wizard lies in acquiring an ancient relic known as the Heart of Ahriman.
A Witch Shall Be Born: A witch replaces her twin sister as Queen of the kingdom. Her first act? Crucify Conan, the captain of the Queen’s Guard. While this certainly isn’t the best of the Conan stories, that scene of crucifixion is truly memorable, and elements of it were used in the Conan the Barbarian film.

Also included are two drafts of an untitled and unfinished story that features a brief appearance of Conan. The last disc contains an essay, HYBORIAN GENESIS PART II: Notes on the Creation of the Conan Stories which will be of great interest to Howard enthusiasts.

The Bloody Crown of Conan audiobook is produced by Tantor Audio (www.tantor.com), written by Robert E. Howard, and read by Todd McLaren

T Shirt Joe

American Vampire

Scott Snyder continues to explore and expand the vampire mythology established in the first volume of this series with two tales of greed and bloodlust.

The first story, Devil In The Sand, is set in Las Vegas of 1936. The investors of Boulder Dam (a comic book stand-in for the Hoover Dam) are being murdered one by one. It’s not too hard to figure out who, or what, the culprit may be for us readers, as the book is titled American Vampire, but for the story’s protagonist, police chief Cash McCogan, the existence of these blood-suckers will prove to be quite the revelation. He’ll be learning a thing or two about his own family and upbringing along the way. While this story features characters and elements from the Volume One, it’s not necessary to have read that arc to enjoy it. Everything you need to know is here.

The second story, The Way Out, is a different matter. This one continues the story of Pearl and Henry. We’re brought up to speed on what they’ve been doing since leaving Hollywood. They’re trying to put the past to rest, but it just won’t stay dead. Without having read the first volume you may not have enough background to care about the characters in this one. The solution? Go buy Volume One. It’s worth it.

The art, heavy on the inks for a darker tone, is perfect for a story dealing with vampires. The action scenes are superbly paced by Rafael Albuquerque’s layouts. I do, however, find the lines Albuquerque uses to define shading on noses a bit distracting. I looked at every nose in every panel, and this certainly disrupted the flow of the story for me. Mateus Santolouco’s art in the second story reminds me of the early work of Mark Texiera. He knows how to convey emotion on a characters face and his vampires truly look menacing.

While this volume doesn’t match its predecessor in terms of suspense, there’s still enough here to keep you turning the pages.

American Vampire Vol. 2 is published by DC Comics, written by Scott Snyder, with art by Rafael Albuquerque and Mateus Santoluco

T-Shirt Joe

For more of my reviews go to AlienBee.net

Near Death

Markham is a killer for hire. His most recent contract didn’t go quite as planned, and he’s suffering from a gunshot wound. Luckily, like all hitmen, he has a girlfriend who just happens to be a veterinarian with all the skills and implements needed to see to his wounds. He dies for a while, though, and sees a vision of hell in which all his previous victims reside. He comes to, and resolves to save a life for every life he’s taken. Action ensues.

The set-up is simple, and there’s potential for some great stories involving his quest for redemption. What we get instead are some formulaic and easily resolved conflicts. Personally, I’m not sold on Markham’s quick decision to turn over a new leaf. His hell, the brief look we get of it, didn’t really look too bad. Sure there are these depressed looking souls wandering around, but other than that, it looks like a fairly pleasant place.

 This book needs to spend some time on characterization as I didn’t really care whether Markham lived or died through his adventures. Also, he’s taking more lives than he’s saving, so I’m not sure how that’ll work out with his ‘balancing the scales’ agenda in the long run.

The high point of the book is the art. Simone Guglielmini’s work adds tone and atmosphere, and the action is conveyed well.

Near Death is published by Image Comics, written by Jay Faerber, with art by Simone Guglielmini.

Reviewed by T-Shirt Joe

For more of my reviews go to AlienBee.net

Spider Man/Red Sonja

I’m not a big fan of film remakes. I’m even less a fan of comic book remakes. How many times have we seen the Spider-Man or Batman origins retold? This is a remake of a different sort. In issue #79 of Marvel Team-Up (1979), the title that paired Spidey with a different member of the Marvel Universe each month, an amulet on display at the museum releases Kulan Gath, an evil wizard. Spidey shows up to take him down, followed by a pesky Mary Jane Watson. When Spidey is on the ropes, Mary Jane picks up a sword which then transforms her into Red Sonja. They beat Kulan Gath and a victorious Peter Parker throws the amulet into the Atlantic because he can’t fly to the Sun and throw things there the way Superman does.

Years later, writer Chris Claremont brought the amulet and Kulan Gath back in a terrific two-parter in the pages of The Uncanny X-Men. Gath is much more powerful this time around and has woven a spell that is transforming the city and everything in it, including the X-Men and the Avengers, into a medieval world. Spider-Man is tortured, the X-Men and the Avengers fight as they always seem to do, and eventually everything is returned to normal.

2008’s Spider-Man/Red Sonja is nothing more than a reimagining, retelling, or whatever silly term you want to use that basically means the same thing as REMAKE of those two previous Kulan Gath stories. The mysterious amulet, which was surely touched by several hands while in transport and while being set up for display, is touched, thus releasing Kulan Gath. He does his magic thing and New York turns into the set of The Sword and the Sorcerer. Mary Jane turns into Red Sonja. She and Spidey fight…a lot. This one features neither X-Men nor Avengers, but you do get to see Tolkien versions of several Spidey villains. Featured prominently, of course, is Venom. Always on the lookout for a more powerful body, Kulan Gath manages to remove the alien symbiote from Eddie Brock to become…get this…KULAN VENOM.

There’s not much here to recommend…unless you’re a fan of splash pages. There’s a whole lot of splash pages.

Spider-Man/Red Sonja is published by Marvel Entertainment, written by Michael Avon Oeming, with art by Mel Rubi.

Reviewed by T-Shirt Joe

For more of my reviews go to Alienbee.net

Turf

With a mix of mobsters, vampires, and aliens, TURF seems like a dream come true for any geek. It would certainly make for a tremendous blockbuster film. As to how it succeeds as a comic, however, I’m a bit conflicted.

The plot involves a group of vampires seeking to take over the mob turf of Prohibition Era New York. Mob boss Eddie Falco stumbles upon and befriends an alien who has just crash landed on Earth. Together, they seek to rally the remnants of the mob and a frightened citizenry to combat the vampires. It’s a good, solid, story that covers all the bases, but it does so in a way that has been employed many times before. We have a brother versus brother power struggle in the vampire clan. We have an unlikely romance between the ‘good’ brother and a Lois Lane type reporter. We have the locker-room speech made before the final attack on the vampires. Great for a movie, but comic readers want just a bit more.

  At times, we get just that. Particularly in the form of a corrupt policeman who is one of the most vile characters to appear within the pages of any comic in years. His ‘origin’ scene is particularly horrifying, partly because of the cheery way the artwork is presented, providing a surreal contrast to the brutality it conveys. As to the art work, Tommy Lee Edwards is an incredible talent and I’ve long admired his style. There are scenes here, however, that are a bit confusing, and had me stop to try and figure out what was going on. Never a good thing in comics. Is it worth reading? I’d say so. Will you want to read it again? I’m not so sure.

The Turf HC, which collects issues 1-5 of the series, is published by Image Comics, written by Jonathan Ross, with art by Tommy Lee Edwards.

Reviewed by T-Shirt Joe

Harbinger

The Valiant Universe of the 90s was one of unrealized potential. There were great ideas, intriguing characters, and a number of unquestionably talented creators at the helm. All of these things were set aside, however, in pursuit of the quick buck. Every Valiant book was quickly immersed in an indecipherable inter-company crossover. Storylines involving domestic abuse, homosexuality, and corporate greed were placed on the back-burner to introduce as many characters and get them into their own books as quickly as possible in the hopes of creating buzz…which would then create sales.
It worked.

The early Valiant books were mainstays of Wizard Magazine’s Top Ten list guaranteeing sales and a demand for back issues which commanded high prices.

Eventually, people started to actually read the books, and discovered that they weren’t that good. The heroes of Valiant then faced a foe that no hero has ever defeated, Declining Sales. The Valiant Universe was laid to rest. But….as every comic book fan knows….death is a temporary thing for a superhero

For those unfamiliar with the title, Harbinger is the story of Peter Stancheck, a troubled youth with psionic abilities. Because of immense potential of his abilities, Peter has attracted the attention of Toyo Harada, founder of the Harbinger Foundation, a corporation recognized for its humanitarian efforts and scientific contributions to the world. Behind the scenes, the Harbinger Foundation serves as a training ground for those gifted with superhuman abilities. Peter soon finds himself at odds with Harada, due in large part to his methods of activating the abilities of latent superhumans; not all who undergo the process survive.

The Valiant of today seems to have learned from the mistakes of the past. Writer Joshua Dysart is given time to develop both the characters and the conflict. Peter is not the clear-cut hero we’ve seen all too often in superhero books. Peter uses his abilities in questionable, and sometimes horrible, ways to fill his base desires. On the other side of the fence, Harada is not the clear-cut villain with the ‘conquer the world’ goal we see on a monthly basis in far too many comics. Harada believes in what he’s doing and feels the end justifies the means. Through both characters we see the pressures and pitfalls wielding such power can bring.

The first story-arc, entitled Omega Rising (Issues 1-5) is set-up for things to come. While the focus is on Peter and Harada, we’re also introduced to a number of intriguing supporting characters that will surely play pivotal roles in future events. There’s plenty of action, as well, so while the book gives us much to think about, there’s just as much to geek-out over.

Dysart seems to be in for the long-haul, as he’s developed a number of sub-plots in this first arc and left readers with a number of unanswered questions. If what he has planned next is as good as what he’s done here, you should definitely go along for the ride. Artist Khari Evans does a tremendous job of making each member of this large cast a recognizably distinct individual. The action scenes flow well and a when someone gets hit in one of Evans’s panels, it looks like it hurts. My only complaint concerning the artwork is that the inks look a bit heavy at times; I’d really like to see some of the penciled pages for comparison.

With this version of Harbinger, Valiant seems to be telling us they’re ready to allow their characters to achieve their true potential.
Harbinger is published monthly by Valiant Entertainment, written by Joshua Dysart, with art by Khari Evans. Visit Valiant on the web at: valiantuniverse.com

Reviewed by T-Shirt Joe

For more of my reviews go to alienbee.net

Marvel Zombies: Halloween

I stopped buying monthly comics years ago and strictly read trade paperback or hardcover collections these days. I still scan the racks, however, and on occasion a cover will capture my attention. Such was the case with Marvel Zombies Halloween. Francesco Francavilla isn’t a name I’m familiar with but his zombie renditions of Black Panther, Daredevil, and Power Man were solid enough to get me to drop $3.99 on the counter. It didn’t hurt that Power Man was in his old costume instead of the t-shirt and jeans he currently runs around in.

Before this, my only exposure to the Marvel Zombie Universe was from its two-issue introduction in Ultimate Fantastic Four. It was a really good story, but I was never eager to read any of the other Marvel Zombie books that followed in its wake. Still, there’s very little you need to know going in. In this reality, the superheroes are zombies and they’ve pretty much decimated the planet. They’re super-powered, and hungry for flesh.

 This self-contained story follows a young boy who’s lived the majority of his life in this undead apocalypse. Having never celebrated a Halloween, he becomes intrigued by the idea of dressing up and trick or treating. Mom, a battle-hardened veteran of this nightmare world, puts together a costume for him, but knows the streets are too dangerous to do any actual trick or treating, plus…just about everyone else is dead. The boy’s newly acquired cat thinks otherwise, and bolts from the house. What’s a boy to do? Head out on the streets to retrieve the cat, of course. Enter the zombies…Marvel Zombies! Darkhawk, Squirrel Girl, and Alex Power are among the undead in pursuit of the boy. Luke Cage is there too, but the cover lied to me and he’s not in the old costume. When things are at their worst, help from a very unlikely source arrives.

The story is well paced and Allesandro Vitti’s art adds a great amount of tone as he seems to use a lighter hand when drawing the quieter moments of the story as opposed to the heavyer, bolder linework in the scenes of violence. Overall, it’s truly entertaining story and fits well with the Halloween season.

Marvel Zombies Halloween is published by Marvel Comics, written by Fred Van Lente, with interior art by Alessandro Vitti and a cover by Francesco Francavilla.

 T-Shirt Joe 
For more of my reviews go to alienbee.net

WEAPON X

January is the time of the year when everyone shares their ‘best of’ lists. I’m not big on lists, and my reading/viewing habits are so random and disjointed that putting one together for any particular category would be almost impossible. If I were to make one for ‘Best Wolverine Stories’ however, Barry Windsor-Smith’s Weapon X would certainly be at number one. It’s much better than the overrated Origin, more gruesome and compelling than the admittedly good Old Man Logan, and more intelligent than anything ever produced within the pages of his own self-titled comic.

Originally serialized in the pages of the weekly Marvel Comics Presents, the story reveals for how Logan had his bones laced with adamantium. It’s a tale filled with blood and suspense. It was rare for readers of any Marvel book to see the main character put through such torture. Logan, in fact, has very little dialogue throughout the course of the story as he spends most it being operated on, mentally manipulated, or in a savage rage.

There are no expository captions in the story, nothing to tell you where the story takes place, how much time elapses between scenes, or to give readers insight into the characters. Rather than use that technique, which comic readers have come to rely on, Weapon X utilizes a perfect marriage of art and dialogue, sometimes through the use of traditional word balloons, but most often through color-coded dialogue captions that flow around the panels to give the closest thing possible to stereo-sound within the pages of a comic story. This is the perfect example of what comics could and should be like.

If for some reason you’ve never read this book, do yourself a favor and pick it up. If it’s already part of your collection, it’s probably time you took it off the shelf to read it again.
Weapon X collects material from issues 72-84 of Marvel Comics Presents, is published by Marvel Comics, with story and art by Barry Windsor-Smith.

 T-Shirt Joe

For more of my reviews go to http:alienbee.net

Superman vs Muhammad Ali

Look at that cover. Superman in the ring boxing against Muhammad Ali. It doesn’t get much more ridiculous than that. Even in 1978 at the tender age of six (Yes, I’m that old), when I saw this on the magazine racks of the local grocery store, I thought it was the dumbest concept DC could have come up with. Why pit Superman against Ali when there were colorful and devious villains like The Parasite, Brainiac, or Lex Luthor around? So…I passed on it.

Sooooo many years later, I realize the mistake I made.

Superman is at his most heroic in this book Ali sounds like Ali; he talks the talk and walks the walk. The Neal Adams art is something to behold. Words really can’t do these pages justice.
An alien race invades earth threatening to destroy the planet. The only way Earth can avoid this fate is if its greatest champion can defeat the champion of the alien invaders. Both Ali and Superman step forward to answer the challenge. First, however, they must face each other to determine which of the two is truly worthy enough to face the hulking alien champion. Superman is rendered powerless to make it a fair fight.

Is it ridiculous? Of course it is, …but it’s fun. We tend to forget that almost everything in comics is ridiculous upon close inspection. That’s what makes reading comics such a joyful experience. We’re leaving reality behind to enter a world where people can shrink to the size of an atom, create giant green boxing gloves through the use of a cosmically powered ring, and where the planet is invaded or held hostage on a monthly basis. We’ve become so wrapped up in wanting our comics to be ‘realistic’ that we’ve lost sight of the sense of wonder they can instill by being anything but.

Leave the world of brooding superheroes behind for a moment. Enter a world where Superman learns just how devastating a right hook from Ali can be, where Jimmy Olson calls a fight in his best Howard Cosell voice, where the fate of a planet is decided within the confines of a boxing ring.

See you ringside.

T-Shirt Joe